And. Here. We. Go.

Jacked from Steve. Make sure you follow the rules.

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc).
2. Put it on Shuffle.
3. Press Play.
4. For every category, type the song that’s playing.
5. When you go to the next category, press the next button.
6. Be honest.

Runaway/Linkin Park

Dead Stars (Club Version)/Conevant

Never Dare To Ask/X-Marks The Pedwalk

These Empty Rooms/Mesh

Incubus/The Electric Hellfire Club

Make My Blood Boil/Leather Strip

Into The Light Of The 13th Dark Night/Balzac

Life In Mono/Mono

Deep Down Trauma Hounds/Skinny Puppy

Somewhere Else To Be/V.A.S.T.

Papercut/Linkin Park

Always/Gravity Kills

Lastlight/VNV Nation

Hallowed By Thy Name (Shallow Be Thy Grave)/Cradle of Filth

No Rest For The Wicked/Leather Strip

Diesel Power/The Prodigy

Game Over (Final Fantasy X)/Nobuo Uematsu

An interesting playlist. Not what i would have picked for some of them, but i literally laughed so loud at END CREDITS that i woke up Brea. Good stuff.

Twisted Reality

Note: This post is going to seem really strange to some people.

I’ve never really been a big FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST fan. I happen to love 2 songs (Ready Stead, Go! by L’Arc El Ciel and Rewrite by Asian Kung Fu Generation) that were used for opening themes for the series, i occasionally caught bits and pieces of it on ADULT SWIM, and was aware of it in general as a generic action anime. I caught some of the later episodes on AS and started to pay attention as the series seemed to get noticeably dark. I did some research on it and the decision was made to buy FMA in it’s entirety and watch it from start to finish.

In hindsight, i probably wasn’t ready to do that. Now, yes, i understand, it’s a cartoon, the characters are not realbut the series has definitely left me feeling things i haven’t felt in along time. It is not a “feel-good” anime, regardless of what kind of package it appears to come in. I had my expectations all wrong.

FMA is devastatingly tragic, so much so that it has affected me way beyond the point where i just wonder how a writer can put her characters such heartbreak and am incredibly sad thinking about Ed and Al’s story. Now, i know that the original manga is much different from the anime, but the prospect is the same and i’m having a really hard time letting go. The ending of the movie especially got to me. While i understand the premise behind it, i still don’t think justice was done.

I’ve immersed myself in story lines from FMA materials, novels, videogames, OVAs, manga, about books, and it just seems like everything, while fronting happy-go-lucky, just invites more tragedy. It makes you feel like if you do enough research, you can change things… even though you know you can’t.

I don’t know. I just can’t seem to let it go, but i suppose that’s the mark of a good writer. In an interview, Hiromu Arakawa said that she hopes people can enjoy it for what it is and not get drawn too far in by some of the themes, but i don’t know how that’s possible.

I feel like i did years ago… trapped in a world where the fantastic is impossible and we’re forever be trapped in static mundane. Like there’s no way to fight back against the reality of the world and all you can really do is try to remain blissfully ignorant and just march forward. In recent years i’ve been fortunately distracted from feeling like that except for occasionally, but it seems to be rushing back to me now. A window who’s view i’d ignored, but all it took was one look and now my gaze is transfixed.

I think i’m going to read the manga, knowing it has a different fate in store for the Elric brothers.

It’s going to be hard to shake this… but it always is.

Is this still even a holiday?

So, Best Buy decided to drop the price of certain DVDs to $19.99, so… the decision was made to purchase Fullmetal Alchemist, in it’s entirety, and the movie and to spend all of today watching them, start to finish.

Why am i here writing this then you ask? Well, we got to Episode 19 and the PS2 is overheating so we have to give it a break. Bad news, especially since i plan on playing Bujingai: The Forsaken City for a good long while when it arrives later this week.

That’s right, Bujingai, an obscure, old PS2 title.

After my tour i’m pretty much all Wii’d out, though i do love the SNES version of Sim City available. As for the PS3… ugh. I’m not convinced, by any of the new systems, that “next-gen” is really here. The more and more it’s pushed, the more and more i just fall back and dig up my old-skool favorites. I don’t know how much longer i can work in this industry.

And after FMA, i have the full Samurai Champloo set to enjoy. (^-^)/

Broadcast Silence

3 shows left, 4 days until i’m home. There’s no one left on this tour who cares anymore. We all just want it to be over. We’re all burned out, run down, and barely making it by every day.

I feel so broken down. I can’t wait to be home and just sleep in my own bed. By far the worst Fusion Tour to date.

A Lack of Color

Usually, when you’re on tour, you pick out something about the bands you’re touring with that is decent. A redeeming quality to nod your head at to prevent yourself from going insane having to hear them every day for 6 weeks… There is no such aspect to Hawthorne Heights. They fucking suck, 100%, through and though. It’s kind of astounding.

The Sleeping are just great guys, The Plain White T’s play a short set every night and have missed a bunch of shows, Emery… well, they’re similar to HH except you can’t hear a fucking word they’re saying because all they do is scream everything. Reliant K has the single guitar riff from Devastation & Reform that is better than everything by The Plain White T’s, Emery and HH combined. In-as-such Hawthorne Heights may be the worst band of all time…

5 more shows though. St. Louis, Milwaukee, Des Moines, Champaign, and Chicago. We found out today that the Milwaukee show has been moved from The Eagles Ballroom down to The Rave because ticket sales were so bad. I laughed for a good 20 minutes when i first head that. It still makes me laugh.

This tour, despite having a decent staff (minus the total douchebag tour manager, Matt), has been as close to a disaster as you can get without actually canceling the whole thing. We’re just scraping by now, with nothing but the end-in-sight keeping us moving forward.

I was thinking about crashing out in Chicago for a few days after the tour since i was thinking about moving there, but at this point i just want to get back to my beloved NYC and hibernate all winter and recover from this hell.

Quote from Dez, my Field Manager:

This tour is… baffling. BAFFLING. It’s like tracking Sasquatch… with no guide.


Finally behind the keys of my new laptop. It’s an awesome machine, but it’s going to be a long, arduous, process rebuilding the amount of customization my old one had.

The biggest thing is that i’m back online fulltime. I hate feeling like i’m disconnected.

Lithium Flower

So it seems that i either have a blown circuit on my mobo, or the mobo is cracked near the power jack. It looks like the cheapest way to salvage my poor laptop is to get a docking station, which bypasses the power line input. Hopefully it will work, but at this point i’m loathe to spend any more money. I’m going to have to use the last of my battery power to unlock the HD so i can access it with another machine for the time being. Fun.

It’s freezing here in Portland. The last week and a half of shows are coming up and they can’t be over fast enough.

At least i get paid tomorrow.


Well, after 3 and a half years of faithful service my poor laptop has finally called it quits. To my own credit, it’s purely a hardware issue, the common Dell “battery no longer charges” problem.

My new one is on the way, a little XPS speed demon, and should be arriving around the 6th of November. Until then i won’t be online much so if you really need to get in touch with me… well, you probably already know how, or know someone who does, if you can even read this.


My thumbs, pointer fingers, and middle fingers are peeled down to the muscle on both hands from this tour. It looks like I have leprosy of the hands.

Usually I photograph myself on tour, but this time I’m going to post pics of the show I built in Atlanta yesterday. They don’t really do the footprint justice, but of all the shows I’ve built so far this one has turned out the best. This is the 4th year we’ve been in the Cotton Club of the Tabernacle so I already had it planned out in my mind when we got there. It was also the premier of The Legend of Zelda: The Twilight Princess (Wii Version) on Fusion. It’s replacing Metroid Prime 3: Corruption on the tour until we can get an updated MP3 demo out.

Jacksonville was today, Ft. Lauderdale tomorrow, then our first day off in 20 shows. It’s actually a travel day, but at least there’s no show.