Twisted Reality

Note: This post is going to seem really strange to some people.

I’ve never really been a big FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST fan. I happen to love 2 songs (Ready Stead, Go! by L’Arc El Ciel and Rewrite by Asian Kung Fu Generation) that were used for opening themes for the series, i occasionally caught bits and pieces of it on ADULT SWIM, and was aware of it in general as a generic action anime. I caught some of the later episodes on AS and started to pay attention as the series seemed to get noticeably dark. I did some research on it and the decision was made to buy FMA in it’s entirety and watch it from start to finish.

In hindsight, i probably wasn’t ready to do that. Now, yes, i understand, it’s a cartoon, the characters are not realbut the series has definitely left me feeling things i haven’t felt in along time. It is not a “feel-good” anime, regardless of what kind of package it appears to come in. I had my expectations all wrong.

FMA is devastatingly tragic, so much so that it has affected me way beyond the point where i just wonder how a writer can put her characters such heartbreak and am incredibly sad thinking about Ed and Al’s story. Now, i know that the original manga is much different from the anime, but the prospect is the same and i’m having a really hard time letting go. The ending of the movie especially got to me. While i understand the premise behind it, i still don’t think justice was done.

I’ve immersed myself in story lines from FMA materials, novels, videogames, OVAs, manga, about books, and it just seems like everything, while fronting happy-go-lucky, just invites more tragedy. It makes you feel like if you do enough research, you can change things… even though you know you can’t.

I don’t know. I just can’t seem to let it go, but i suppose that’s the mark of a good writer. In an interview, Hiromu Arakawa said that she hopes people can enjoy it for what it is and not get drawn too far in by some of the themes, but i don’t know how that’s possible.

I feel like i did years ago… trapped in a world where the fantastic is impossible and we’re forever be trapped in static mundane. Like there’s no way to fight back against the reality of the world and all you can really do is try to remain blissfully ignorant and just march forward. In recent years i’ve been fortunately distracted from feeling like that except for occasionally, but it seems to be rushing back to me now. A window who’s view i’d ignored, but all it took was one look and now my gaze is transfixed.

I think i’m going to read the manga, knowing it has a different fate in store for the Elric brothers.

It’s going to be hard to shake this… but it always is.